the last one is my favorite because I do it all the time in school and also it has nothing whatsoever to do with cute puppy dogs

It's been a while and I have nothing newsworthy, so I'll just mention a few fun posts on a page I found. There's this blob called 1,000 Awesome Things done in a style similar to Stuff White People Like and PostSecret. I get the feeling they're running out of good ideas, which is a shame because it's a countdown from 1,000 and they're only at like 637. But it's heartwarming in a way.

A number of them had me silently shouting Amen.
Here
are
five
of
them.

P.S. I recently learned that entries show up in Google Reader the way you first posted them - unchangeably and irremovably - which is stupid because most people make corrections after the fact (as I always do), links sometimes don't work the way they're first posted (as was the case here) and many people delete embarrassing/unintentional posts right away (as I have done, unfortunately). Anyway, if you're reading this part, you're actually on my blog and you've been warned not to fully trust what shows up in Google Reader (if you're hardcore enough that you're subscribed to me, which is apparently true of 30 people).

i give you a 5.7

I'd like to hear any 5-10 of the most pretentious music reviewers in the world collaborate on an album together. My guess is that it would suck. Then I'd write them a scathing review of it and their indie cred would plummet and their careers would be OVER.

soapbox

I'm going to get on my soapbox about a word I can't stand.

It's the word "soapbox". More specifically, it's the circumstances under which the word is used - and thus, the connotation it has - that I can't stand.

So far as I've observed, the word is nearly always employed when someone knows the advice he/she is offering is going to come across as obnoxious, and he/she still offers that good ol' quasi-gentle pontificating (if that works) anyway - often accompanied by a sheepish "I'll get down off my soapbox now" apology and maybe a smiley emoticon.

This is as much about setting oneself up for failure as it is about offering (unintentionally) patronizing advice. I am irritated when I hear/read waffling utterances like "I know this is probably going to annoy you, but..." Then don't say it. And if you do, don't be hurt or surprised when your ostensibly wavering friend is indeed very put off by your attempts at help.

It also has to do with owning up to what you say and not making excuses or apologies. If you really feel the need to be straightforward with a particular person, be straightforward in a tactful and encouraging way - don't be a jerk and then add "I don't want to hurt your feelings or anything"* if you actually meant what you said. If your "soapbox advice" is more than you should be giving, don't give it. Don't even set that soapbox down, baby. Take the soap out, wash your own faults off with it, and recycle the box. If it's an old wooden one, put a bunny in it with some straw and vegetables.

I believe we all need to be kinder. What that means to me, though, is not that we ought to give pointers to people we don't know that well but do it in a nice soft voice with lots of "maybe"s and "a little"s. It means we need to offer as much encouragement as we can muster and not do anything to dampen the spirits of someone who might be struggling. No backhanded encouragement or compliments.

And now I'm done being on my soapbox :)


*This calls to mind the all-too-familiar "I'm not racist or anything, but..."
-which also reminds me of the following Onion News Network ticker: "Man negates racial slur by preceding it with 'really great'"

showt

I just discovered I got a shout from my dear cousin Merzy a while ago here.

It was 3.5 months ago, I know - and I had wondered why I wasn't in the wedding photos she took. But one nice little sentence about me is enough to make me feel like a million bucks.

Much rub to my cousins.

farts & free tickets

Speaking of my hilarious and effective low-level prank streak, I just punk'd Julie. She never actually farted in front of me while sleeping. Hi Julie.

Also, thanks to Elisabeth for being kind enough to offer me free tickets to see David Bazan. It was a great show.

I've written about Bazan before, so I'll keep this short: He makes my heart ache.

His lyrics can cut so deep. He raises some tough questions about faith and authority via brilliant analogies. In the past he often has, especially with Pedro the Lion, sung from the "unreliable narrator" POV (i.e. speaking as someone else whose perspective is flawed), but I think he's getting more directly personal with his solo work.

Even if his voice weren't one of my favorites, his music so engaging and melodic and fitting, or if he weren't such a nice guy with a great beard, I'd still hear/read his lyrics and be left with a bewilderment that can only be expressed with a solid "MAAAN."

Everyone -

You've been punk'd. Julie and I are not engaged. Not even close.

We thought it'd be funny since the tendency in Utah when two people are dating is to constantly ask if, in so many words, said two people are betrothed.

Sorry to break everyone's hearts :) :) :)

dum, dum, da-dum...

I am engaged to the most wonderful girl in the world.

Tonight we went to dinner at our favorite restaurant. We then bundled up and I took her to the park, where we had dessert on a blanket and looked at the stars. I had to swallow many lumps in my throat before finally telling myself it was "time" to tell her everything I had felt. I think she knew it was coming - there was tension in the air. Positive tension.

So I did it. And she said yes. We both have felt the Spirit confirm that this is right in the relatively short time we've been together. Tears flowed from our eyes as we shared our heartfelt thoughts and kisses.

My Marriage Prep teacher at the Institute said that courtship and engagement should accomplish purposes together, and the length of engagement should do what courtship has not or cannot. Thus, we're still deciding on a date. But it's official: Time and all eternity will be spent with Julie.

I love you, babe. Thank you for everything.

l15t

Hi. I've had a list of things I wanted to make posts about sitting on my desktop, and if only for the sake of eliminating virtual clutter, I'm going to address them briefly. I've obviously been on a massive David Lynch kick recently, so they're pretty much all about him.

1. A sign that Lynch is a truly versatile filmmaker is his capacity to make utterly moving, heartwarming movies in addition to his wacked-out ones (read: zany romps!!). He is most assuredly not a parody of himself (as has been the accusation from reviewers who were too freaked out by his most Lynchian movies to think his most recent work is legit). The Straight Story is a prime example (that last scene in which they pretty much say nothing is gold), as is The Elephant Man. If you haven't seen a Lynch movie, I might recommend the E-Man first over any other.

Also, it made Julie cry. But, you know, that isn't hard to do.

Because she's a sensitive, kind person. But only during movies. Not in real life.

I mean she only cries in movies. Not that she's not sensitive in real life.

Heh..

2. Here's a comment he made about his filmmaking process - it's similar to mine for songwriting: "The feeling I have," he says, "is that someone is in another room with a completed puzzle and they keep flipping pieces in to me and as I get them and see them and feel them, I write them down until a whole thing starts revealing itself."

3. Laura Dern is married to Ben Harper (a longtime favorite muscian of mine). She has also been in three of Lynch's most memorable movies.
Connections regarding that: Her character in Inland Empire is named Sue Blue; Harper has a song called "Suzy Blue". Also, "People don't change; they just reveal" is a line from Inland Empire that Harper paraphrases (quotes almost verbatim, actually) in his song "The Way You Found Me". It's nice for me to know that a black soul-folk-reggae-rock-blues musician is interested in and inspired by the work of such a guy as Lynch, the likes of whom are sometimes accused of being too academic and "white".

4. I'm kind of a copycat. Who are some of my biggest influences in music and film? Tom Waits, Elliot Goldenthal, John Lurie, Mark Sandman, Jim Jarmusch, and Lynch.

And what do they all look like? Six feet +/-, mostly-black outfits, a "great nimbus of hair"*, and they have deep voices (except, of course, Lynch).


*from Garrison Keillor's brilliant "Young Lutheran's Guide to the Orchestra".

vague

I am underestimated regularly. I'm not sure what the reasons are for it, but it drives me berserk. I guess people think I'm easy to read.

lynched

I've been in LA/Irvine the last few days. It's been pretty dope. As has become tradition when I'm here, I drove around on Mulholland Drive today and Saturday. What made today's trip especially good was that I ate at the Bob's Big Boy in Burbank where David Lynch evidently ate every day for seven years (?). The turkey burger and chocolate shake I got were fantastic. In honor of Utah, I dipped a fry in my shake.* It sucked. I like California better.

I then found D. Lynch's current house. It was pretty nuts. I was very, very tempted to stop and ask him if I could use the bathroom. He could have offered me a role, having thought me fittingly mysterious with my boyish face, manly voice and strictly-business all-black getup. Or I could've told him about my music, played him a tune or two, and offered to score his next film for next to nothing. Or he could've just been pissed that I bothered him at home.

In any case, I didn't bother him. I drove and walked around Hollywood and Sunset boulevards instead. I eventually headed back to Irvine for my bro's birthday dinner. It's been great to spend time with Nate and have some one-on-one time with him. He and Katie have been very nice to let me stay with them twice recently.

How I got on the Lynch kick: I was here in July for my cousin's wedding. The only Lynch film I had seen was Eraserhead. I liked it, but didn't feel any draw to see the rest of his work. After accidentally discovering Mulholland Drive in July (and knowing of its mysterious, prestigious reputation), I decided I had to see the film of the same name. It is now one of my favorites.
-Funny enough, my good friend Kyle Parsons watched Mul. Dr. first and didn't like it, but saw Eraserhead next and exclaimed that the world of Lynch "all made sense" afterward.

In keeping with this Lynch theme (http://howcouldyounott.blogspot.com/2009/09/themes.html), I brought The Straight Story and Dune, two of the four Lynch features I had not as yet seen, from home (rented from library). I watched Dune last night. The reviews were right. It sucked. Something pointed out to me by a David Foster Wallace article** I read (http://www.geocities.com/~mikehartmann/papers/wallace5.html) was that while Eraserhead was a very low-budget film, a labor of love for Lynch, and lauded by almost everyone who saw it, Dune was an enormous and expensive undertaking, Lynch hated it (won't talk about it and formally disowned the extended version), and most fans and critics did as well.

In any case, I love David Lynch. Part of what makes him great is his participation in so many forms of art - film, painting, singing, composing, sculpture, even furniture and fashion, although he wears pretty much the same drab outfit every day (I like that). That all-encompassing artistry makes his movies that much better.

I also love his hair. And his voice. Allow me to favor you with an impression of him next time I see you.

*at least at the Salt Lake high school I attended for a year, pretty much EVERYONE thought that going to Wendy's, getting fries and a Frosty, and dipping the former in the latter was the greatest thing on earth. I like to mix things and all, but I never took to it. Probably the stigma of other annoying and inexplicable Wasatch Valley traditions prevented me from enjoying it.

** the brilliant full text of which (in which he also describes Lynch's studio, just down the street from his house, which was also the house in Lost Highway) is here: http://www.lynchnet.com/lh/lhpremiere.html. Why did DFW want to die? He is missed.

off

ROFL WAFFLES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (sorry, had to)

I'm going to LA and the Bay Area. Probably very soon. It'll be cool to see my bro and his family (they're gracious enough to put me up at their place in Irvine), hang out in my favorite parts of LA, see a few friends, then head up north to see my folks and more friends.

Also: Hi Julie, thanks for being cool and intelligent and fun and expressing feelings, and thank you for boosting my wavering self-esteem via linking people to my blog, I'll miss you, etc.

cops & contfurnts

Last night, Julie (hi Julie) and I discovered that the woman who has been screaming herself hoarse and banging on Julie's kitchen wall for the last week was directing her screaming and wall-banging at Julie and me. We thought she was abusing a mute child, yelling on the phone, mad at her cat(s), or hearing voices - we never heard anyone else. I tried to knock on the door and talk calmly with her, but she kept screaming and calling Julie a bitch (and Julie doesn't do things to aggravate people. kind of.) and wouldn't come out, so we got help elsewhere.

Long version: http://howcouldyounott.blogspot.com/2009/10/so-police-were-at-my-house-last-night.html



Also, conference was this weekend.

-Elder Bednar, whose style I have never liked, gave a fantastic talk about what good parents ought to do -- express & show love (two different things), share & act on gospel testimony, and be consistent.
-Elder Choi from Korea talked about nine young dudes who went from causing trouble to getting baptized and serving missions thanks to a good example.
-Elder Ballard talked about fathers & sons sharing feelings ("nothin' more than...").
-President Monson talked about not getting mad so easily (esp. when offense wasn't even meant).
-Elder Holland, as usual, breathed fire from the pulpit. It was pretty awesome.

And one of the best parts was when Marlin K. Jensen, who spoke at my very first mission zone conference and was totally chill and hilarious (and is a Democrat - hooray), gave a prayer. In it there was no praying for us as a church, as happens in about every conference prayer - it was almost solely a prayer for people who are sad, impoverished, struggling, etc. That really needs to happen more often.

what I like about Pixar flicks

Julie & I went to see Up last night after scoring some Red Iguana. Parenthetically, the Red Iguana was quite good, but if I hadn't known that it's consistently the most hyped - and crowded - joint in SLC, I wouldn't necessarily have thought it should be. That's not to say it doesn't have bomb food and great service.



Back to Up.

Most movie actors are attractive. Even the characters who are supposed to be homely or sad are still played by pretty people. Beyoncé Knowles as Etta James, Josh Brolin as Bush, Rachael Leigh Cook as the school loser, Johnny Depp as Ed Wood, Charlize Theron as Aileen Wuornos (and her character in North Country), Jim Caviezel as Jesus... six is enough for the sake of argument.

Pixar movies seem to be about the triumph of the underestimated. A short, square-faced widower and a chubby little boy - both socially maladroit - fulfill their dreams in Up; unloved monsters and frightened children make friends in Monsters, Inc.; a lonely robot finds love in Wall-E. And let's not forget that Nemo was physically handicapped.

I'm only a passive fan of computer animation, but one thing I do like about it is that it doesn't have to succumb to making everyone prettier than they need be.

cuteeeeee

Picnic in the park with Julie. Oh fer cute and funnnnnnn.

futile-ize

Everyone who utilizes the word "utilize" really could just utilize "use" instead. Can I get a amen?